winterene (winterene) wrote,

MST3K (Mystery Sex Theater 3000)

Almost more fun than actual sex.


http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/a-mazi-ng-3-new-asian-girls-23/10385390

Yeah, I'm sure the girls look just like those pictured.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/60-incall-pecial-all-day-boys-60-dont-miss-out-60-26/9277131

Nothing wrong with being a prostie, but being a RACIST is despicable!!!



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/come-get-a-taste-of-this-latina-bombshell-22/11167357

Why would anyone want to do a lady with no face???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/75-special-hot-latina-sensual-kassandra-713-452-0874-24/10620600

AARRGHH!!! MORE BLATANT RACISM IN THE 21st CENTURY. FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING RACIST CUNT!!!



http://www.npr.org/2011/08/08/139112308/guards-vintage-pop-but-practically-piercing

Umm... was she born female???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/beutifull-blonde-wow-the-best-in-city-all-day-and-nigth-23/10387922

STAY AWAY FROM HER! SHE'S BEEN CONQUERED BY STARRO! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starro



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/your-fantasy-girl-lets-play-im-ready-23/11152150

Notice the spelling of her name "NiNa"--the unconventional use of capital letters indicates that she is a very creative individual and would probably make for good conversation.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/new-sweet-in-spa-sugarland-spc-39992-girls-buy1-get-1-23/11105954

Human trafficking, anybody?



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/lovely-karmynn-50-incall-specials-21/11132923

Extra capital letters means EXTRA fun!!! And there's nothing sexier than those pics with the camera visible.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/sexy-stunning-beauty-100-real-pics-25/4599438

Real photos? Pshaw.

And I *DARE* YOU to click on that "Jada" link. Have fun with your virus.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/s_-i-_-m_-p_-l-_-y-_-the-_-b-_-e-_-s-_-t_-21/11109399

If that's a real photo I'll stop eating meat for a MONTH!



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/b_-i_g_b_o_o_t_y-m_i_x_x_e_d-f_r_e_a_k-60-incall-spcl-18/11168335

Notice the clever way she protects herself against entrapment. I'm sure that'll hold up in court.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/f-l-a-w-l-e-s-s-22/9826799

If you're going to bill yourself as "flawless", how about not posting a shit photo like that.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/hot-sexy-latina-510-curvy-100-special-all-day-all-nigth-247-make-your-app-22/11080944

Um, somebody needs to learn to smile more.

Look who's talking.

MY SOUL MATE???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/hands-down-no-compation-paradise-23/11176645

Awesome booty shots, but what if Sir Mix-A-Lot is out of town this weekend?

And what the fuck is "compation"???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/lets-play-fun-with-superhead-the-kinkyess-ebony-ever-23/11176591

"Superhead"? I guess she must be really smart. Kind of an odd trait to tout in a forum like this, though.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/all-nightincall-50-special-limited-time-only-20/10481373

She looks like she wants to KILL you in that last photo.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/i-love-it-in-my-btt-petite-ebony-100-special-20/11176562

Um, a BOTT is a larva of a botfly, so why would this lady want "it" in there???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/sexxxy-nice-azz-dds-perfect-lips-avail-til-late-80-specials-26/11150867

Kelly Clarkson? Is that you???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/exceeding-expectations-20/11176441

Um, Alaska looks kinda baked in that second photo.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/ready-for-the-weekend-28/10498299

I think that dress is supposed to hypnotize us. I feel dizzy already.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/new-in-town-sexy-german-with-a-body-of-a-goddess-try-me-on-20/11176344

Oh wow, she's on Twitter! That gets my vote!!!



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/blonde-million-real-white-men-only-19/11087293

Ooh, I'm in love.

Wait... she's a RACIST!!! FUCK THAT BITCH!!!



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/60-special-andgtearly-morning-loving-andgt-sey-blonde-andgt-60-23/11163897

I guess by "mature" she means "senile", because that's the only type of guy who would call based on those pics!



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/i-feel-a-sin-coming-on-22/9820299

Is this being even human, the way her booty sticks out like that? Doesn't seem humanly possible.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/new-sexy-here-to-play-new-to-the-katy-area-special-rates-22/11176201

Um, "she" really should take off the Michael Myers mask before trying to take glamour shots.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/huge-boobs-model-in-town-832-921-9366-starting-100-28/9918082

Why the fuck would anybody want to see a woman who obviously has some kind of infection down there???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/i-do-the-things-your-wife-wont-do-houstons-1-premier-provider-nikki-t-832-322-7531-28/11176100

By all means, bring your fat wallet to the door of a pro with NO PHOTO!!!



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/i-love-what-i-do-and-you-will-too-25/10993215

When is "MUAH*" going to make it into TWL???



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/n-e-w-i-n-houston-s-u-p-e-r-blonde-hottie-new-20/11175968

Oh no, that third photo certainly doesn't give away the FAKENESS of these photos. Nope, not at all.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/b_-i_-g-_-b_-o_-o_-t_-y-_-3-8-d-d-_-m_-e_-x-_-i_-c_-a_-n_-a_-28/11133682

Didn't I see her at the circus once?



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/80in-get-somewhile-its-hot-100out-deliciously-exotic-with-a-spicy-attitude-im-ready-25/10455791

Nadya Suleman, is that you?



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/t-r-e-a-t-y-o-u-r-s-e-l-f-20/11056823

Nope, that doesn't look like a guy at all.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/eroticsexy-blonde-new-in-town-305-924-0518-22/11175634

Notice the strategic placement of the lockers, to give off that whole high school vibe.



http://houston.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/blazzzin-blonde-_-1-gentlemans-choice-_-incalls-jones-1960-oucalls-houston-24/11140633

Why do so many women appears to be climbing the walls? Shouldn't they be wearing Spider-Woman costumes for that?
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